Gut Check

For about 1 hour when I first awake, I’m an optimist.

Having just rolled out of bed, I haven’t yet screwed up anything.

I’ve barely been conscious for 7 minutes; just long enough to cradle a mug filled with 4 ounces of coffee and promise myself today is the day I’ll take care of my peeling nail polish.

This is the sweet spot.

The devil didn’t derail me on my short commute from the bed, to the toilet, to my couch.

So lay it on me, Jesus, I’m ready for anything.

And here’s what this morning’s devotional revealed:

“… A necessary ingredient of discipline is perseverance. Any training—physical, mental, or spiritual—is characterized at first by failure. We fail more often than we succeed. But if we persevere, we gradually see progress till we are succeeding more often than failing.” (The Pursuit of Holiness, pg. 105)


Why is this relevant?

Admittedly, this coming admission is tangential at best, but, after weeks of clean eating, I stuffed my face with cake today.

Seven hours later, I’m following my husband around the kitchen whining about how terrible my innards feel.

Spongy, pink, adorned with wilted roses, and left over from a baby shower a co-worker attended over the weekend. That’s what did me in, THREE-DAY-OLD confetti sheet cake.

Just so we’re clear, I don’t have an unhealthy relationship with food.

But I’ve been in strict training mode, dutifully logging my miles and hitting the weights in anticipation for an upcoming marathon I’m scheduled to run in two weeks.

Thanks to the tweaks in my diet, I feel better, I have more energy, and I sleep soundly, comforted by the knowledge that I’ve consumed the appropriate ratio of veggies, proteins, and carbs for the day. I’ve even learned what a branched chain amino acid is.

Which is why my body wasn’t prepared for the cake bomb I set off earlier in my gut. Turns out sugary goodness and artificially-dyed batter isn’t a super food.

Now here I sit, bellyaching on the same couch where I started my day 15 hours ago. On the very cushion where I read these wise words, “The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again.” [Prov. 24:16]

And thus, inspired by my early-morning zeal to conquer the day, I’m determined to live up to the words I scrawled in my journal “Keep going when you blow it.” I’m going to put myself to bed and try again tomorrow.

Because while my path may be marked by setbacks and cake coma, I WILL PERSEVERE and daybreak will find me filled with hope and swinging for the fences.

One thought on “Gut Check

  1. Kristy Neeley

    So well written so fun to read but even better so full of truth humility and like a compass always pointing us back to true north in Gods good plan. Love you


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